Stolen Innocence
by NightmareHeartx
Summary: Assaulted and left in the streets to suffer, Juvia developed a fear of all men. Including her one true love, Gray Fullbuster.
1. Chapter 1

_**Author's note : **_Well, here's my Gruvia fanfiction. I've wanted to write it for several years, but I never really had the time/resources/writing skills to pull it off. Enjoy!

**Rated T for :** Implied rape, suggestive themes and mild language. I'd recommend this for readers 14 and up. (It's not enough to be rated M, though.)

x-x

There was one thing Juvia couldn't understand at all. And that was love.

She was hopelessly besotted with Gray, yet Gray showed little to any signs of returning her affections. She had tried everything; from making him lunch and outright professing her love! And yet, he wouldn't even react. It was frustrating, to say the least.

She hadn't a clue why she had chosen Gray to adore. But, once Juvia had her mind set on something, she wouldn't stop until she would to able to obtain it. And, in this case, _it_ was Gray.

Of course, she wasn't particularly good-looking…not to say that she wasn't desirable. It was just that, considering most of the girls in Fairy Tail, she was quite plain in contrast to them. She was decent looks, but, if somebody compared to someone like Mirajane or Erza, well, she was downright unattractive.

Though, not every man overlooked her. Lyon, for starters, was totally head-over-heels for Juvia. She didn't quite understand why, but felt uncomfortable by his frequent advances. Not to say that she didn't like Lyon, it, was just that, she just _liked _him. She was convinced that the only man in her life would Gray.

But he entirely ignored her. And that drove her insane.

Lucy, her rival-in-love, had organized a party. Juvia was quite sure what the occasion was, but she didn't care right now. All that mattered to her was that Gray was going to be there.

And if Gray would be there, then, she sure as hell wouldn't refuse. She needed to look her best; her beloved Gray did deserve the best, after all!

The party would be taking place at 9:00 PM. Perfect. Just enough time for her to get ready.

After taking a long bath, she applied her makeup carefully. She rarely applied makeup, but when she did, she made sure that it had be there when Gray was involved.

Putting on a beautiful blue sundress, she hurried to the destination, hoping that she wasn't late.

x-x

"Good evening, Lucy-san!" she greeted warmly.

"Ah, Juvia! It's great that you came." Lucy chimed, opening the door. Juvia wanted to sigh in frustration. Lucy looked absolutely _gorgeous._ She was wearing a tight, short red dress that exaggerated her her rival in love, Juvia could help but feel jealousy overwhelm her.

But, Lucy's warm smile was able to tame her. "Come on in, Natsu and Erza are already here."

Juvia's face fell. "Will Gray-sama be coming…?" she asked, afraid to hear the answer.

Lucy chuckled. "Of course he will. Maybe, later, though."

Relief met Juvia. "Juvia is sorry to ask, Lucy… but, what's the occasion?"

Lucy giggled. "Ah, it's nothing, really. I just felt like having a party."

x-x

An hour had passed, and Juvia, despite the fact that Gray hadn't yet come, was thoroughly enjoying herself. So far, everybody had shown up, expect for Gray… but, she wasn't quite thinking about that. Natsu and Erza were, well, up to their usual antics, Elfman was raving about how much of a 'man' he was in front of Evergreen, and Cana was…drinking barrels.

Then, the doorbell rang. Juvia's heart soared.

"Oh, hi, Gray," Lucy started, until she was interrupted by Juvia. She shoved Lucy to the side.

"Gray-sama! Juvia is so happy to see you!" She exclaimed, rushing to hug him. To her dismay, Gray merely walked passed her, ignoring her presence, prompting her to fall face-flat on the ground.

"Hi, everybody," he said casually. Despite her aggravation at Gray's density, she couldn't help but admire his nonchalant tone. He was so…

Juvia got to her feet, but, unsurprisingly, he had already started to bicker with Natsu. Juvia frowned, but was forced to deal with it. She lazily dragged herself to Lucy's couch and sat down, upset that she couldn't be able to be with Gray alone.

Though, she was able to notice Gray stop abruptly. "Ah, lame," she heard Gray mutter, "My necklace….I must have lost it when coming here."

Juvia stared at Gray curiously. His necklace he had frequently worn was no longer hanging around his neck. He lost it?

For some odd reason, Juvia had suddenly formed a brilliant plan. Yes…if she put this plan in action, why, Gray would be hers forever!

"Gray-sama, did you lose your necklace?" she inquired calmly, playing naive.

"Yeah, I guess."

"If you'd like, Juvia could go and look for it."

"That's okay, Juvia, it's not that—"

But Juvia was already standing in front of the door. "It's okay," she assured him, flashing him a wink. "Juvia can take care of herself."

Gray shrugged. "Okay, if you want to."

Juvia smiled. "Everyone, I'll be right back!" she stated, and with that, she departed.

x-x

Juvia decided that in order to find Gray's necklace, she needed to follow his trail. The path from Lucy's home to Gray's was, quite a distance, but Juvia didn't care. If it had to do with earning Gray's love, then she'd gladly comply!

Following his path, she carefully analyzed every area. She needed to find his necklace, at any cost.

Until, she was able to see an object vaguely sparkle in a crack in the ground.

She gasped, rushing to the place. This was _definitely _Gray's necklace. She felt so ecstatic she could hardly breathe. With this, Gray would certainly fall in love with her!

Despite her happiness, she sighed in disappointment. "Who am I kidding?" she scoffed. She was constantly feeding herself with lies that if she helped Gray in any way possible, he'd fall for her.

Which she had done several times. But Gray only viewed the both of them just as comrades. Which, was quite upsetting.

Standing up, she decided to return to the party nonetheless. Gray wouldn't give her a peck on the cheek, let alone start dating her, though she was used to this fact.

But as she turned around, apprehension surrounded her.

She was lost.

She hadn't been in this area _ever. _The buildings were tall and there seemed to be no sign of civilization. Juvia felt stumped. She hadn't even brought her cell phone. So, she was forced to find her own way out of this situation.

To her relief, she saw a group of men, about her age, stroll near to her.

"Oh, thank goodness," she said out loud, and rushed to them. "I'm sorry, but could you tell me where I am?"

One of the men, turned to Juvia with a sneer on his face. "Eh? What do you want, lady? Get out of our sight."

All of them chuckled darkly and continued to walk, ignoring Juvia's presence. Irritation churned in Juvia's stomach.

"Geez, you can't even tell me where I am. You're so impolite!" she exclaimed hotly.

"Huh? Who're you calling impolite, you stupid woman!" one of them turned around to jeer.

"Hmph." She said crossly, and began to walk away. She would seek help from somebody else. "You're nothing but an asshole."

Unexpectedly, one of them grabbed her hand. "What did you say?" he snarled, spitting on her. He was able to catch a glimpse of her guild mark on her upper thigh.

"Hm… that guild mark, and judging from your face, you must be Juvia Lockser from Fairy Tail."

"Yes. Now, then," she told him nonchalantly, utilizing her water body to release herself from his grasp. "Juvia doesn't want any trouble." She turned around, but, to her horror, the two other men had surrounded her.

"You know, we don't take lightly to those who speak so terribly to us," one of them started, and suddenly threw something on her wrist.

"As Juvia said before, she doesn't want any trouble," she clarified, "But if Juvia must, she will fight." She tried to activate her magic, but was unable to.

Instantly she realized it had to do with the device that had been firmly wrapped around her arm.

"W-what did you do?" she demanded, fear now starting to engulf her.

"Nothing much," one of them smirked. "Just used a Nekousoku tube."

"Y-You're mages?" No. This couldn't be happening.

She tried to run away, but they pinned her down.

"No! Stop!" She pleaded. "Juvia is sorry she said that, really!"

The two of them looked up to the apparent ringleader.

"Should we let her go? We might get in trouble…" one of them asked

But he just evilly grinned. "Relax. She hasn't got parents. True, she's in Fairy Tail, but she won't want to tell anybody what happened to her after we're done with her." He leaned down to whisper in Juvia's ear.

"Right? Maybe if you beg for forgiveness, we'll only let you go with minor injuries."

Juvia managed to kick him in the gut.

He let out a sharp cry of pain, and Juvia attempted to slide herself from their clutches.

But they were too strong for her to bear. Juvia relied on her magic while fighting, and if it was disabled, she couldn't stand a chance.

"You bitch," he growled, and clutched her throat. "Do you have a death wish?" he hissed.

Juvia coughed for air. She found herself start to slip from reality, only the shock of this all kept her conscious

"Hm…" he said, licking his lips. "You know… you're pretty hot…"

He started to squeeze her throat, prompting her to cry out in pain.

"And your screams are sexy too," he added. Juvia wanted to spit at his face.

He turned to the two of them. "Boys, I think you both know what we should do here…"

Juvia could feel tears start to stream down her cheek as she saw him start to strip. He swiftly reached her face and forcefully kissed her.

_No…_

Juvia attempted to fight them back. She struggled with all her might. But they were too strong for her. And she was unable to do anything. All she could do was just painfully wait for it to be over.

x-x

The leader panted heavily. "Wow… that took a lot out of me."

Juvia didn't hear him. Her innocence had been forcefully ripped out of her. She couldn't think, feel, or speak. All she could do was stare blankly at nothing.

He was obviously satisfied. "Let's go," he told the men holding her down.

"What should we do with her?" one of the men questioned.

"Just leave her there. I think we've taught her a good enough lesson."

And so they left without another word.

Juvia laid there, shocked. It was as though she had been in a coma, and now, she had awoken. As she regained her sanity, she realized what happened.

Gradually she started to sob. She didn't know what she had done to deserve this… everything was ruined…

She attempted to stand up, but quickly tripped and fell on her head, blurring out her vision. The pain was soothed by the fact that she'd fainted.

She should just die.

x-x

_**Author's note : **_-cough- Well, that was rather dark…

I'm aware that this chapter isn't so nicely written, but later chapters will be, trust me. (:

Should I continue this…?

And, if you're wondering why Juvia initially referred to herself in first person when talking to those thugs, it's because she didn't really want to reveal her identity to strangers.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Author's note : **_I didn't think you'd all like this story so much! Well, here's the next chapter. Enjoy!

x-x

Gray tapped his fingers on Lucy's table impatiently. Natsu was bugging the hell out of him to the point of psychosis. Though, it didn't add to the fact that the party itself wasn't interesting.

He didn't even notice the fact that Juvia hadn't come back in over an hour.

Until, that is, Lucy pointed it out.

"Hey, Gray," she suddenly stated, "Where did Juvia go?"

Gray sighed. Juvia was still probably searching for his necklace. It was almost as if he was using her for his own personal gain. He couldn't deny his feelings; he felt terrible.

He was aware that she was in love with him, but, Gray didn't quite know how to deal with it. He wasn't one to act all lovey dovey with another person, and he totally wouldn't for Juvia. Not that he found her annoying, she was just his comrade.

"She…went to go look for something I dropped." Gray admitted.

Erza, overhearing their conversation, shot Gray a glare.

"Are you stupid or something, Gray?" she snapped, making Gray flinch. Erza was definitely frightening when she was angry. "You shouldn't just be manipulating Juvia like that."

But, Gray, being as stubborn as he was, felt the need to defend himself. "It's not my fault!" he protested, "she went on her own. I tried to tell her not to, but—"

"Don't care," Erza scolded, "Just go and fetch Juvia. Knowing her, she's probably still looking for something she'll never find."

Gray groaned. "Man…" Stumbling to his feet, he put on his coat and turned to face his guild mates. "Does somebody mind coming with me?"

Everybody simply shot each other uneasy glances, prompting Gray to snort.

"Fine, I'll go by myself."

x-x

Gray strolled leisurely forward, not in a hurry to find her. For some odd reason, most people in Fairy Tail considered Juvia to be his girlfriend, something he would hastily deny. He wouldn't dare date Juvia; not because she wouldn't be a supportive girlfriend, but, rather, she would be quite the case.

Not to mention, he wasn't one to get wrapped up in relationships. All that unnecessary kissing and holding hands… no way!

Despite walking around aimlessly for about 10 minutes, he couldn't find Juvia. He frowned. What could that girl be up to?

"Lame," he moaned out loud. Though, a sinking feeling sprouted in his stomach.

What if something happened to her?

Nah. Couldn't be. Juvia used to be an S-class mage in Phantom Lord, for goodness sake! She was certainly as strong as him, if not stronger.

"Juvia!" he called out, scanning every area he could encounter. As he continued walking,

though, to his dismay, he saw a figure laying down on the ground

"Hey, Juvia!" he started, running to her. As he approached her, though, horror swiftly engulfed the ice mage.

Juvia was standing there, terror darkening in her face. She was staring blankly into the distance, not even appearing to notice Gray crouching next to her. Her neck with covered in bruises and blood was seeping from her head.

However, that wasn't what disturbed Gray the most.

It was the fact that her clothes were ripped and she was covered in…

Gray couldn't even think properly. Anguish erupted within like a storm raging during the winter.

_No…Juvia…_

"Juvia!" He shouted, gently tugging her arm. "Get a hold of yourself!"

No response. She just laid there, catatonic.

"Please!" he pleaded, guilt suddenly overwhelming him. If he had only stopped Juvia from searching for his stupid necklace, then…

To his relief, Juvia snapped back into reality.

"Who's… there?" she croaked. Her voice had become monotonous, similar to the tone she had when they had first encountered.

"It's me, Gray!" _Damn it…_

For some odd reason, this was the only time he wanted to see Juvia act like herself again. But she wasn't acting like herself. Not in the slightest.

Gray felt her body go limp, and panic arose in the ice mage.

"Crap…" he hoisted her up bridal-style and started to run to the nearest hospital.

x-x

By now, it was 12:00 AM, and the entire guild hadn't gotten any sleep in the last hours. When Gray had called them and informed them that Juvia was attacked, well, Fairy Tail went mad.

They were all sitting there in the hospital, waiting for the doctors to inform them if Juvia would be okay or not. Torment was shrouding their faces.

After what seemed like decades, the doctor had finally opened the door to give them an analysis.

"What happened to her?" Lisanna asked nervously, frightened to hear the answer.

The doctor sighed. "Judging by our examination, it appears as though Miss Lockser has been…sexually assaulted."

An eerie silence roared throughout the guild.

The doctor, adjusting her glasses, added solemnly, "She has several bruises on her neck, which we believe was caused by strangulation. Unfortunately, she also has mild brain trauma…which, doesn't seem to have been caused by the perpetrators. She may have tripped."

Everybody shot each other uneasy glances. Natsu, in his fury, managed to snarl, "I'll kill that bastard…anybody who hurts our comrades…won't be forgiven!"

Gray was equally as livid as Natsu, but managed to restrain his anger, despite the fact he was bristling.

The doctor continued. "I think the injuries should heal in several weeks. However…" her voice trailed off.

"However?" Erza echoed sharply.

"Well… the whole incident has caused quite an…effect, on her. It seems as if she has developed androphobia."

"What?" Gray demanded. "What's that?"

"It's an irrational fear of…men. When we were examining her injuries, she would break out into panic attacks whenever a male doctor would approach her. We would then have to sedate her."

"That'll heal, right? It's just a temporary thing, right?" Cana pleaded.

The doctor looked away. "I can't say anything for sure. It's a psychological problem, not a physical. It all depends on her will. I recommend you keep her away from men for some time."

Gray gritted his teeth in agony.

"But…she doesn't seem to be pregnant, or have any sexual transmitted diseases." She finally said.

Gray couldn't even feel comforted by her sentiment.

"Can we…visit her?" Lucy asked.

The doctor shook her head. "We asked her, and she doesn't feel ready to see anybody right now. Though, she will need somebody to escort her home tonight…she can't walk."

"I'll do it," Gray immediately offered, but Lucy grabbed his shoulder.

"_I'll _do it, Gray. Didn't you just hear her now? She said that Juvia shouldn't be around men."

Gray stared at Lucy for a moment. "Juvia's not afraid of _me." _Though his tone had been arrogant, he was certain that Juvia couldn't be afraid of _him. _

Lucy snorted, but didn't reply. "I'll escort her home," she told the doctor sweetly.

The doctor eyed her. "That's kind of you, but… shouldn't her legal guardian escort her?"

"We are her family," Lucy simply said, and the doctor shrugged.

"Okay. I'll go get her." The doctor returned to Juvia's room, before adding, "I suggest you all keep your distance when she appears."

Gray waited for her to appear, knowing that he may regret seeing her.

The door opened.

Gray stared at her, petrified.

All emotion had been sucked from her face. Despite the fact that Juvia was pale, quite now, it appeared at though she was completely white. She was fidgeting nervously, and her eyes were red, a sign that indicated she had been crying.

The entire guild watched her in shock. Juvia didn't even acknowledge their presence. There was no life in her eyes.

Yet, Gray couldn't help but try to get her back to her normal self.

Disobeying the doctor's orders, he rushed up to Juvia and grabbed her shoulders.

"Juvia, are you okay?!" he asked desperately.

"You idiot, what are you doing?" Erza scowled, attempting to pull Gray off her. But Gray remained attached to her.

Juvia's eyes grew wide with fear, and gasped. "Let…go…" she whimpered. But Gray didn't listen.

"Juvia, you can't be scared of me… please!"

"_Let me go!" _she shrieked, trembling. Gray, shocked, immediately released her.

"Juvia…no…" he gasped. But Juvia showed no emotion at his sorrow.

"_I'm sorry._" Was all she said.

**Author's note : **Well… yeah. Dunno if you find this chapter interesting, but, it will get better later on. –nods-

Thanks for all the positive feedback! (:


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note : **Thanks for all the reviews! They really inspire me. (: Well, here's the next chapter. It would have come sooner, but I've been out sick with the flu. Enjoy!

x-x

Nothing made sense anymore. Amidst all the turmoil, Juvia knew that only she was to blame.

She didn't want for anything of this happen.

She didn't want to be violated, she didn't want to become a nervous wreck, and she definitely didn't want to yell at Gray.

But all of that was a reality.

A cold, sick reality that made Juvia want to vomit.

She didn't want her first time to end up like that. She couldn't even remember how _they _looked like.

She didn't even _feel _normal. She felt tainted, as though her clean body had become corrupted.

Though, her mind had become corrupted.

She could no longer look at men casually without fearing that they might defile her.

She couldn't even look at Gray again with becoming frightened of him.

And the thought, that she feared the one she once most loved, made her want to cry.

Lucy walked alongside Juvia, glancing at her worriedly. Obviously, Lucy had to look out for Juvia, considering the fact that Juvia could faint any moment.

"Are you okay, Juvia?" she inquired fearfully.

"No. _I'm _not okay."

Lucy flinched in surprise, stunned by the fact that Juvia had referred to herself in first person. Juvia almost always referred to herself in third person, and whenever she didn't, it was usually when she spoke to strangers or when she wanted to make a point clear.

Juvia took note of Lucy's shock, but Juvia knew she couldn't refer to herself in third person anymore. She was no longer a girl. She had taken a horrifying push into womanhood and could never go back.

Yet, Lucy felt the urge to assist Juvia in any way possible.

"Juvia…if you ever…need…anything… you can tell me…" Lucy offered tersely. "I wish I could have done something to stop those people who did that."

"It is fine, Lucy. It could have happened to anybody."

Juvia couldn't refer to others with honorifics anymore either. She had been stripped of her own honor, and thought that meant she shouldn't respect others anymore either.

x-x

"Okay, Juvia…call me if you need anything," Lucy told her before bidding her farewell. Juvia waved in return, but in reality, she was slowly starting to go mad.

She found Erza and most of the other girls inhabiting Fairy Hills waiting for her. Few of them actually spoke to her, but they gave her comforting glances that said much more.

Erza was one of the few who spoke to her. "Juvia… if you need anything, just call my name and I'll help."

Quite similar to what Lucy had said.

Upon arriving at her home, Juvia almost instantly stripped and went inside of her bathtub, immersing her entire body in it. She sat there for an hour, wanting to cleanse her body entirely of their intimate touches.

But it didn't help at all.

Changing into her pajamas, she dragged herself to her bed and pushed aside her Gray plushie. Clumsily she felt into the comfort of the bed's blanket and tried to force herself to sleep.

But the water mage couldn't.

All she could think about their menacing voices taunting her throughout the whole ordeal.

"_Ehehe…your body's starting to tense…" he snarled._

Tears started cascading down Juvia's cheek. She had never felt so broken. _So abused._

Darkness flooded her entire existence. She would be haunted for the rest of her life.

And yet, there was only one way to end her suffering.

_No._

She didn't want to.

_You know you have to. _The demonic voice inside her mind told her menacingly.

"Go away…" Juvia murmured somberly. She placed her hands in her face. "Go…" This voice was murdering her sanity. That is, if there was any sanity that could be salvaged.

_It's the only way you'll be free._

"_Go away!" _Juviascreeched. "_Get OUT! GET OUT!"_

She fell to the floor, eyes wide with dismay.

"Please…just leave my head…" she mumbled, sinking her nails into her palm so hard that they bled. Why was she being tortured? _Why _couldn't she just be left alone?

Suddenly, Juvia heard pounding on the door which she had locked.

"_Juvia! _Are you okay?"

It was Erza.

Juvia got to her feet. "Yes, Erza…I'm fine. I'm sorry," she lied, "I just…saw a spider, and I wanted it out."

Erza hesitated, but managed to reply. "Very well. Call me if you need anything." Juvia sensed doubt prickling her voice, but Erza had most likely chosen to trust her. Erza left as promised, something Juvia figured out by listening to her footsteps.

Juvia stared blankly at nothing for several moments, until she managed to whisper,

"I'm sorry, Erza…" she said, "But this will be the last time you'll be speaking to me."

Waiting several moments for Erza to return to her bed, she opened the door to check if anybody was in sight. Nobody was there, and the lights were turned off.

This put her plan in motion.

Silently she slowly walked through the hall, taking note not to get caught. Anxiety pulsated through her veins, but she ignored the sensation. She needed to complete her task.

She needed to end her life.

That would be the only way she could be free of her misery.

After what seemed like an eternity, she finally reached the kitchen. It was difficult to see due to the darkness, but Juvia was able to make out figures from the shadows. Going to the nearest drawer, she hastily pulled out a large chef's knife and pointed it to her throat.

_Do it._

Juvia hesitated, starting to tremble.

_Do it…!_

"I…can't…." she panted.

_Do it!_

She clenched her teeth, allowing for more tears to fall down her cheek.

Suddenly the lights turned on.

Juvia's eyes widened. Facing the door, she saw somebody she really didn't expect to see.

Gray.

And he was about as surprised as she was.

"Juvia… what are you doing here?" he questioned, darkness edging his voice. Realization dropped like a stone in his stomach when he noticed the knife she was clutching.

Juvia gulped. "Gray…"

**Author's note : **Very. Dark. Chapter. Sorry if it's too much for you guys to bear.

And, if you might think Juvia's overreacting, well, let's just say he didn't 'gently' rape her. Let's just say that he '******* violently' raped her. (and yes, it was just one person who actually raped her. The other two just held her down.) Of course, if I were to post the rape scene, then, this fanfic would earn an M rating, something I wish to avoid. Maybe one day I'll post the rape scene somewhere on , but rate it M. –shrugs-


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's note : **I'm baffled by the fact that so many people like this fan fiction! xD I didn't think it'd receive so much attention. Here's the chapter, as promised. Check my profile to see when this story gets updated.

* * *

Juvia stared at Gray, petrified. She tried to speak, but choked on her words.

"I-I'm…" She began nervously, forgetting that she still had a knife directed to her neck.

"Juvia…why...?" Gray murmured. His head was starting to hurt; it was almost as if he would black out. Shock pulsated through his body. His chest was beginning to ache, as if he'd been stabbed himself. He couldn't quite believe the entire scenario.

He'd arrived at Fairy Hills because he felt the need to be around Juvia. He'd heard somebody in the kitchen, and believing it was an intruder, instantly rushed into it. What he hadn't expected to see, though, was _Juvia _herself.

Yet, he managed to remain conscious and approach Juvia, reaching his hand out to her.

"Were you planning on…?" Gray started to question, but found himself unable to utter the words. He knew quite well what was Juvia's intention, but part of him didn't _want _to admit that Juvia had nearly committed suicide.

Juvia dropped the knife, starting to drastically hyperventilate. "I-I-I," she whispered in between gasps, panting. Reality had started to warp, anxiety flooding her mind. She hadn't a clue why Gray had shown up in the worst possible moment.

And all of it started to distort reality.

As Gray came closer, Juvia trembled in apprehension. "Please don't come closer," she said, voice shaking. "Please."

Gray couldn't ignore her plea. It was too desperate and genuine that the ice mage would resent himself forever if he had. So he obeyed her request, stopping. He gritted his teeth in frustration, attempting to control himself.

He wanted to hug her.

He wanted to hug her so she could be able to see that he wouldn't harm her. They were comrades, after all, and a hug would show her that she had no reason to be afraid.

He wanted to tell her it would be okay.

But it wasn't okay.

It wasn't okay at all.

Nothing was okay anymore.

His initial shock was replaced with anger. Fury engulfed his entire mind and body; he was forced to prevent himself from destroying the entire kitchen.

He didn't want this.

Disobeying her request, he angrily walked up to Juvia.

"Juvia, why would you kill yourself?" He snarled, preventing himself from physically touching her. "_Why!? _How do you think Fairy Tail would feel?!"

Juvia tensed, uncomfortable by his closeness. His eyes were blazing with anger, though Juvia wasn't quite sure if it was directed at her or not. Juvia took a step backward instinctively.

She wrapped her arms around her body defensively.

She looked at the ground, distraught. "What would you know, Gray…" she mumbled darkly. "You don't know what they did…what they said…you don't know _anything _about how I feel."

Juvia started to walk away, but Gray blocked her.

He reached out his hand to her shoulder. "Juvia, just tell me—"

He was interrupted by a punch to his face.

The ice mage fell to the floor. If this had happened in a regular fight against his guild mates, Gray would have shrugged it off and gotten back to his feet. Yet a punch as insignificant as this was unbearable.

He looked up at Juvia, who by now, had tears in her eyes.

"Why couldn't you just listen to me…?" she cried out, "I don't want to be like this, but…" she proceeded to run off in tears.

Gray couldn't find the will to get back to his feet. He really hadn't expected Juvia to hit him. And while the punch itself wasn't painful, it was the fact that _Juvia _had done it made it insufferable.

By the time he'd gotten over the shock, Juvia was already gone, presumably back to her own room.

Erza arrived to the scene moments later.

"Who's there?" she snarled, but relaxed upon noticing Gray sitting on the ground.

"Oh, it's just you. What are you doing here, Gray?"

Gray looked away miserably. "Nothing," he said casually, getting to his feet. "I just felt uncomfortable with the idea of Juvia being left alone."

Erza frowned. "That's kind of you, Gray, but you shouldn't be sneaking around like that."

"Whatever," he muttered, walking away. "Keep a close eye on Juvia."

Erza narrowed her eyes. "We're already—"

"Not close enough," Gray spat, "Just do it."

And then he left.

Gray didn't show up at the guild the following day. He felt too wracked with guilt to even stand up from his bed. He figured that Juvia wouldn't even show up to the guild either.

It was his fault.

If Juvia hadn't gone to search for his stupid necklace, then she wouldn't have been assaulted. It was all his fault.

His fault.

He was genuinely worried about Juvia. It pained him so much to see one of his comrades so troubled. And there was no guarantee that Juvia would return to her former self…which, strangely enough, Gray _wanted. _Prior to this entire incident, he would have preferred it if Juvia would stop irritating him with her conquests of _love. _Yet now, if he had the option to revert Juvia back to normal, then, he would have done so in a heartbeat.

* * *

_Gray forced himself out of bed. He couldn't spend the entire day cooped up in his house. Despite his misery over the rape of Juvia, he needed to do something productive._

_Putting on his trademark white coat, he strolled out of his house to return to Fairy Tail._

_Until he was interrupted by a piercing screech._

_Which he instantly recognized as Juvia's._

"_Juvia!" he yelled, searching for her aimlessly. He headed towards the direction where he had heard the voice, yet wherever he turned, it was a dead end._

"_Damn it!" he cursed, panting. He managed to hear a muffled scream, which led him to his destination._

_And there laid a sickening sight._

_Juvia was lying on the ground, covered in blood. Her eyes were red from crying and she had two men standing next to her, zipping up their pants. They smirked evilly at Gray._

"_It's a shame, Gray," one of them croaked. "You were too late to save her."_

"_You bastards," he snarled._

"_And you'll be too late to save her again," he spat. He pulled out a gun and brought it to Juvia's head._

* * *

Gray jolted upwards, falling out of his bed. Panting, he managed to grasp the situation.

_What…_

Suddenly, he realized the whole incident was merely a dream. He wanted to sigh in relief, but he could hardly feel thankful. The intensity of the nightmare made him cringe in agony.

He got out of his bed and lazily put on his clothes. He looked at his clock.

5:00 PM.

He groaned. Had he really been asleep that long?

Shrugging it off, he decided to go to the guild, not having anything better to do. And if he went to the guild, he would get over his negative emotions.

* * *

**Author's note : **…Yeah. Short chapter is short, but actually, the chapters to come will be quite longer. The next chapter will contain about 2000-3000 words. The reason these chapters are so short because, well, they're still a setup. The story starts to enfold in the next chapter. C:

New chapters every next Saturday, fyi! (Pacific time)


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's note :** I apologize for the lateness of this chapter. A lot of stuff has been happening and etc.

* * *

Several days had passed since Juvia's suicide attempt. And frankly, Juvia felt even more despondent than she had thought she would have.

Panic arose. Would Gray tell her guild mates that she had tried to end her life? Juvia was certain that if they had found out, then nobody would forgive her.

Juvia couldn't remember how the rapist looked like. The brain trauma had affected her memory as well. She wasn't even allowed to go outside of Fairy Hills. All she could do was stay in her bed until she was 'well enough to walk long distances.'

And while she felt somewhat physically fit, her mind remained in chaos. She hadn't left her room to eat. She merely nibbled on snacks that she had kept in her pantry. Of course, such an unbalanced diet combined with little to no physical activity was a recipe for disaster.

Knocking was frequently heard on the other side of the door; Juvia presumed it was her guild mates coming to visit her. But the water mage didn't want visitors. She was too disgusted with herself to even care.

This morning was equally as dreadful. More knocking.

This time, it was Mirajane.

"Juvia?" her tone sounded odd, almost forceful.

Juvia gulped.

"Y-Yes?" Juvia asked meekly.

"…I think you should let me in."

The water mage bit her lip. Her tone sounded unnatural; it wasn't even a worried tone. It was relatively serious.

"S-sure." Getting to her feet, she went to the door and met Mirajane.

Mirajane's eyes widened, shocked at the sight of Juvia. Her entire body had become frail and crooked. Juvia, though, was unsurprised at the look of horror on her face.

"What?" she rasped.

Mirajane composed herself and coughed. "Well… how do I put this…" Dismay was sharp in her tone, and Juvia urged her to continue.

"… You must return to the guild."

Juvia fidgeted. "I can't—"

"You see, Juvia… you…need to pay your rent. That's why you should come. Otherwise…" her voice trailed off.

Juvia understood what Mirajane was trying to tell her. Juvia needed to gather enough money in order to keep her home, or else she'd be evicted. Discounts were strictly prohibited at Fairy Hills, even if Erza wanted to comply to them herself. Money didn't grow on trees, and there was no magic enabling such an occurrence—well, none that she knew of.

Juvia hadn't even been thinking about money, and yet a stunning realization hit her.

She would never be able to fight again properly.

If she ever went out on a job, she would be plagued by constant fears of men.

Juvia looked at her feet.

"I'll… go… just…give me an hour to get ready…?

Mirajane nodded in understanding, and left.

_I'm sorry, Mirajane… but I can't ever go back._

Juvia slowly started to pack her belongings. Shame engulfed her, but she pushed the emotion away. She couldn't face her guild, or even properly bid them farewell. Then they would just beg her to stay, and she couldn't do that.

After packing, she quickly scribbled a note.

* * *

Gray had a new resolution; he would no longer run from his problems.

The day after having his atrocious nightmare, he hastily returned to the guild, eager to prove to he was determined, along with the rest of his guild mates, to avenge Juvia by catching the perpetrator.

The doctors had told Fairy Tail that her powers were blocked due to the rapist using a Nekousoku tube. There were no known guilds in Fiore that had mage that used a Nekousoku tube…except for Milliana, who most obviously was _not _the perpetrator. As a result, Gray could only assume that the mage was an outlaw.

So, for the following week, he, along with Gajeel, Natsu and Erza proceeded to go out on jobs in order to find _him._ Yet, none of the mages they had apprehended contained the ability to use a Nekousoku tube.

Juvia hadn't come to Fairy Tail since then. Not even once. And he was still disturbed by what he had seen a week ago. He'd heard several members talking about how they had tried to speak to Juvia, but were coldly rebuffed.

By now, most of the members were out on jobs; the only members still in the guild were Makarov, Lucy and Cana (despite having passed out from drinking).

Mirajane had told the guild that she would try and convince Juvia to come back, though Gray doubted that Juvia would return anytime soon.

He was about pick out a job on the request board, when Mirajane came rushing in. Panic was twisting her face.

"What's wrong, Mira-san?" Lucy asked.

"It's Juvia…she's gone!"

"What?" Gray muttered in disbelief. "What do you mean, _'she's gone'?_"

"I went to her room… and she said to give her an hour to get ready to come to the guild…when I came back she wasn't there. All she left was a note."

Swiftly she took out a piece of paper, and Gray, without hesitation, nabbed it from her hands.

_Don't worry. I'm going to live with my parents. I'm going to be fine. -Juvia_

The ice mage instinctively started bristling. Lucy clasped her hand over her mouth.

Makarov approached Mirajane. "This is terrible…" he murmured. "She left without us even knowing…"

"Why would she do that?" Lucy whispered in alarm.

Makarov looked at all three of them with determination in his eyes. "Maybe it's not too late. Mirajane, wait at Fairy Hills in case Juvia decides to return. Lucy, go to East Forest." He turned to Gray. "And Gray, go to the train station."

All three of them nodded and departed immediately.

* * *

A lie.

A cruel, cold lie.

Juvia could never return to her parents. Because she had brought misfortune to them by constantly causing rain, they had disowned her. She hadn't even spoken to them in years.

And as she sat there, on the bench in the pouring rain, waiting for the train to arrive, she couldn't help but feel repulsed with herself.

She didn't know where she go, what'd she do, or what she where live. All she knew was that she needed to just go _somewhere._

The rain roared even louder, prompting Juvia to take a look at the sky from her umbrella.

"It's raining again, huh…?" she murmured monotonously. "Even after I thought I beat you… you came back…"

Juvia couldn't tell if this rain was her doing or not. But as she became more upset, the more it rained.

The rain had stopped that fateful day when she had fallen in love with Gray Fullbuster. So, did that indicate that she no longer loved him? Or, anybody, for that matter?

Confusion overwhelmed the water mage. To her surprise, she realized that she hadn't been thinking or obsessing over Gray since she was raped. She had essentially been drowning in her pity, blurred by sorrow. It was almost as though she'd been drained of love. Though, she did still care about him…somewhat. She wasn't blaming him at all for what had occurred, but felt too miserable to even care about romantic pursuits.

She sighed, becoming more and more frustrated the longer it rained. Could the train come already?

"What are you doing here?" said a voice out of nowhere.

Juvia turned her head towards the direction where she heard the voice, though she wished she hadn't.

Somehow, Juvia wasn't surprised.

"Gray," she beckoned. "What is it you want?"

He was soaked, and Juvia couldn't help but feel sorry for him. Oddly enough, the atmosphere between the two of them was relatively calm; Juvia had expected that if they encountered, she would have run off crying and such. But she remained rooted to the bench, unwavering.

Gray, surprisingly enough, showed no emotion. Or, if he did, Juvia couldn't tell, since the heavy rain was blocking out her senses.

The ice mage pulled out the note Juvia was written. "What's this?"

"It's a note." She replied.

"You don't say?" Gray gritted his teeth. "Did you really think you could just go and run—"

"I couldn't face them," Juvia cut him off. "I _couldn't._"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means, I know you told them about _that_."—she was directly referring to her suicide attempt.

Gray's gaze didn't falter. "Actually, I _didn't._"

"You didn't?"

"No, but it's pretty obvious that I should have. If they knew you tried to pull a stunt like that, they'd make sure you wouldn't try and run away."

The ice mage immediately regretted what he said the moment his words left his mouth, but attempted to ignore it.

"It's not like it matters. If I went back, I'd only be evicted. I don't have enough money to support myself."

"You don't make any money by staying cooped up in your home, you know." Irritation was beginning to seep into his voice. He hadn't been having a particularly enjoyable day, something that the rain constantly reminded him.

"I…can't be a mage anymore, Gray. I thought you'd know that out of all people."

Tears cascaded down her cheek, prompting Gray to take a step backward.

"I… didn't want to run… but… I'm scared…I'm scared…"

Gray looked at his feet, distraught. He couldn't bear to see Juvia so… _broken._

He was able to hear the train coming in the distance and noticed Juvia getting to her feet, sniffing.

"Farewell, Gray. Perhaps, we will meet again someday."

_No…!_

Yet he remained frozen in place, unable to move. Once the train came, Juvia had shot him one last glance of sadness, and was about to enter.

"Stop— Juvia!" He was able to move again.

Juvia whipped around in alarm. "Gray—"

A tight embrace answered her, prompting her to drop her umbrella.

A dark pit seemed in open in Juvia's stomach. Every nerve in her body had appeared to stop functioning. An intense of fear—no, it was too severe to be called fear. It was pure terror. Her mind was on the edge of snapping. She was about to delve into insanity.

She was unable to think; she was unable to react. Even though the train had left, she remained there, petrified.

The water mage hadn't ever been hugged by Gray before. It was surprisingly warm, something that shocked Juvia due to his element of ice. He remained there in silence.

The rain continued.

Juvia attempted to speak. "G.. r.. a…y…" she choked out.

"Don't go. Fairy Tail needs you. Even if you can't fight, even if you're scared of me… just stay. Please."

There was genuine sorrow in his voice; Juvia had never heard him so wracked with guilt.

"Just… please… don't be afraid."

The rain stopped.

Juvia hadn't even noticed that she had started to cry even more intensely.

"Gray…" she murmured. "I can't…"

"I know," he told her. He was fully aware that Juvia couldn't be a mage anymore. But he didn't want to lose her.

"I'm sorry..." he whispered in her ear. "I'm so sorry…"

She managed to muster the courage to place her hand on Gray's chest, gently nudging him away.

"What are you apologizing for?" She smiled, one which was so false and forced that it made Gray cringe. "It's not your fault… it's _mine."_

The water mage turned around, looking at the sky, her smile fading. "I guess… I liked you so much that I wanted to do anything to grab your attention."

Gray stared at her stupidly, awestruck.

She looked back at him, a gaze who conveyed so much emotion that Gray felt prompted to reply.

"Juvia… you're an important comrade to Fairy Tail…_. _It hurts me to see you like this—"

Gray stopped abruptly when he noticed that Juvia started to bristle.

"Is that… all I've ever been?" She murmured quietly, noticeably agitated. "Is… that it?" Her voice started rising. "Is that _it?"_

She was facing him directly now, face twisted with anguish. Gray couldn't understand her sudden outburst of rage.

"What's… wrong?" Gray inquired, baffled. _Did I say something?_

She gritted her teeth. "Is that how you've always viewed me? As_ just_ a comrade of Fairy Tail? What am I to _you?"_

The ice mage opened his mouth to answer, but no words came out. He felt too stunned to say anything, though he didn't know the answer himself.

_What… _is _Juvia to me?_

He hadn't ever considered her words, and yet, now, he was there, considering them.

To him, Juvia was… important. Yet, even those words sounded hollow. She was _more _than important… she was a deeply cherished friend. But… those words still didn't sound technically correct.

Juvia's piercing stare was beginning slowly fade, and she fell to her knees.

"J-Juvia? What's going on?" Something wasn't right.

The water mage placed her hand on her head. "I feel… weird…" She mumbled before plummeting to the ground.

"_Juvia!"_

* * *

**Author's note :** Well, that's it for this chapter. And, unfortunately, all Gray's acts of kindness so far have been platonic. _(Or have they? –shot-) _Hope you enjoyed!


End file.
